Six Days
by BAutifulDream
Summary: This story goes behind the scenes of what may have happened after 'The Third Way' episode and the six day that followed. What could happen in a cramped campervan surrounded by fields away from civilisation and only have each other for company? For one thing, it would be far from dull!
1. Kidnap Day

Six Days

** Some contents such as plot, characters and majority of dialogue in this chapter belong to the BBC and writers/producers of Holby City, I hold no claim. The rest is my own wicked invention. **

Kidnap Day

She begins to stir, her mind cloudy, she can't think, she's cold. She opens her eyes and the room is spinning, she can't focus. She can't see them, this isn't her bedroom and she doesn't know where she is.

"Morning," the deep voice breaks through her consciousness.

She looks up, her eyes adjust. _It's Luc_.

"You looking for these?"

He has them but why? It's too much to take in and her mind can't make anything out. The thundering pain in her head is drilling away, it's overpowering. She just wants sleep.

"Why this Eddi? Why did I have to result to this?" is the last she hears before drifting off into a state of unconsciousness.

….

She tumbles out of the high bed, almost falling flat on her face as her legs turn to jelly. Luc is nowhere in sight. Where are her clothes? She is sure she was wearing something different. _And why is it so bloody freezing?_ She rubs her arms with her hands attempting to generate heat.

Eddi unsteadily makes her way to the door and with a gentle push it eases open, but she is immediately hit by the bright light, eyes blurring. A few quick blinks and she is able to focus, but what she sees isn't to her liking. Trees, open space, no tall grey blocks in sight.

_Where the hell am I?_

"Luc. Where are we?"

"Huh?"

"I said where are we?"

"Oh, we're in the grounds of a stately home my friend owns. He lets me park up whenever I fancy it."

"Why are we here?"

"Well, you've developed an addiction to Comoxidan which you won't admit to so we're going to stay here until you'll tell me exactly how many you've been taking, I'll decide on an average amount and then we'll gradually cut it down, sort this out."

_He has got to be kidding me. Has he completely lost his mind? There's no way I'm staying here with him!_

"Yeah right," and Eddi storms off to collect her clothes hanging on the peg, Luc watching her every move like a hawk. Her skin crawls as she feels his eyes trail her. Then she makes her way back to his campervan to change, making sure to slam the door shut on her way.

"This is bloody ridiculous," she mumbles to herself as she chucks her clothes off that she slept in and proceeds to dress into her clean ones. "I am _not_ addicted. It's just a little set back that's all. Luc on his bloody high horse, who does he think he is! I wouldn't be in this mess in the first place if he hadn't of buggered off to goodness knows where and then he thinks he can walk back into my life like nothing has happen! Well he can think again." Eddi angrily shoves the rest of her items in her trusted brown bag.

"Now where's my phone?" Her eyes scan high and low but to no avail. She can't find it anywhere. "Now he's gone too far," and she comes bursting back out of the campervan, eyes ready to spit daggers at the man who's currently sitting comfortably in a chair reading a book.

"Have you taken my phone?"

"Yeah."

"Have you totally lost your mind?"

"I've taken your wallet as well."

"What?"

"I didn't know how else to keep you here, I thought you might react like this."

"You've kidnapped me you understand that don't you, this is kidnap!"

"If you want to call it that."

"We're going to get in this van right now and you're going to take me home."

"No, no, I'm not."

"Fine, I'll walk," and she spins on her heels and tramples in the opposite direction as far away and as quickly as she can, slipping here and there on the mud as she goes. _He is even crazier than I thought!_

"Walk where Eddi, you have no idea where you are!" She stops as his words ring true. "Take some deep breathes. Calm down."

Slowly she makes her way back towards him, acting the defeatist. She may have lost the battle for now but the war is far from over. Where there's a will there's a way.

"You really think you can get away with this don't you?"

"We need to talk."

"Talk?" _He has got to be joking. I need a plan._ "Fine, okay. I'll talk to you."

"Good."

"Got something I really want to say anyway."

Luc stands and makes his way over.

_So far so good, my plan is working._

"I need you to listen to me really carefully."

"Of course."

_I've got him! This is for all the pain you've caused me Luc! Pow!_

"Arrgh!"

And she kicks him squarely in the balls and immediately he doubles over, hands protecting his precious jewels, while Eddi makes a run for it.

_Keys in his left pocket. Too predictable!_

He hears the engine start and turns to see Eddi attempting to drive away.

_Oh no you don't woman._ And waddles over to stand in front of the vehicle.

"Get out of the way. Get out of the way Luc!"

However, he needn't worry as the tyres are stuck in the mud and the more she revs the engine the further she's grinding the in. Luc takes this chance to catch his breath back.

"Ahhh," and she slams her hands on the steering wheel in frustration before angrily getting out of the van and storming her way to Luc's side.

"Just, give me the keys."

"Give me my stuff."

"Not going to happen."

Without any other options she turns tail and legs it into the woods.

"Eddi!"

_God! This woman is the bane of my life_ and he swiftly follows her.

"Eddi! This is ridiculous! Eddi, just stop will you!" but the more he yells the harder she runs, slowly draining the little energy she has. At one stage she almost trips over a fallen log, but she is able to right herself before landing in a heap in the mud.

Eventually she rounds a bush and comes across a bridge with Luc hot on her heels. _Doesn't that guy know when to quit!_

"Eddi! Eddi!" _Thank God she's stopped_. "Just, just give me the keys. Don't make me come and get them Eddi. Come on."

She turns to face Luc, chest rising and falling heavily as she tries to catch her breath, and holds out a hand containing the keys.

"Go ahead."

However, as Luc goes to take a step towards her she immediately switches them to her other hand and holds them out over the lake.

"You wouldn't." _surely she's not that stupid to…_

Plop! And in they go.

"You have." _Maybe she is_. "You do realise that neither one of us will be able to leave now."

"Well you're just going to have to wade in there and get them."

"Do you know what kind of diseases could inhabit that lake? All species of animals pee in there, breed in there, die in there…"

"Well you should have thought about that before kidnapping me!"

"How was I to know you'd kick me in the balls, snatch my keys and then drop them into the lake?"

"How would you expect me to react? Stomp my feet once, glare at you and then give you a sarcastic curtsey before walking away. I'm not Elizabeth Bennet!"

"And you better not think I'm going to be Mr Darcy by diving into that lake to search for the keys _you _dropped!" But all Eddi does is give him a pointed stare and crosses her arms. "Fine! Fine!" and he turns his back on her and makes his way down the bank to the water's edge where he proceeds to take off his socks and shoes.

"You weren't expecting that were you? You're just so predictable Luc, I mean even to the, to the small little things like, where you keep your keys you've really got to change that up you know. But I guess that that'll be very, very hard for you because you're just so anal."

"Ow, ow!" Luc steps on something prickly as he shuffles around in the grass.

Eddi laughs. "Sorry, sorry. No, no, no, no, y-you please carry on, this is just too good."

"Whatever it takes to put a smile on your face," he says while beginning to roll up his trouser legs and sleeves, "anything's better than that permanent scowl you've been wearing the past few weeks."

"Oh I'm hurt, I am, hurt by that," a sharp pain in her chest grips her and she finds it difficult to breath. Her stomach is clenching and she knows what is about to happen and is helpless to stop it.

"Eddi?"

The next minute she has crunched over and is throwing up the contents of her stomach all over the bridge. _This is not good_ runs through her mind._ Not good at all_.

Meanwhile, Luc is preoccupied trying to find the keys. Luckily the lake is only about a foot deep and the keys dropped straight down so they'd be relatively easy to find. Shoving his hands under the water he wades through the muddy ground and a couple of minutes later his fingers latch onto something hard and smooth with jagged edges. _Gotcha!_

Gradually he makes his way back to the edge and heaves himself out, thankfully managing not to get a single item of his clothes soaked. Shaking his legs off he places his socks and shoes back on and rolls his clothing back down before making his way back up to Eddi, dangling his keys for good measure, but she's hardly paying attention. Too busy trying not to throw up again.

"What are you looking at? You never seen a hungover person before?" she wheezes out.

_She can't seriously be denial still, not after what just happened!_

"A hangover is that what you call this?"

"Argh, give it a rest Luc," and she turns and walks away from him, Luc never leaving her side.

"You've been unravelling at work, stealing prescription drugs, nearly killing patients by giving them the wrong meds, getting so drunk in front of your colleagues that you look completely unhinged. What do you call that, just letting you hair down?" _Why can't she just admit she has a problem?_ "Are you seriously telling me you don't have a problem? Right prove it."

"What?" she stops and looks at him like he's from another planet.

"Stay here, let it play out. If it's just a hangover you'll be fine won't you? Prove it."

"I don't have anything to prove to you. You of all people." _God I hate him_. "Stay away from me Luc," _for good with any luck_.

_That went well_, he thinks as he watches her walk away…again.

A second later he's following and has soon caught up.

"What part of 'stay away' don't you understand?" she huffs, determination in every step.

"I can't let you walk off alone, you don't know where you're going."

"Anywhere is better than with you."

"Don't be stupid Eddi…"

"Just go away Luc."

A moment's silence descends. Nothing but the echo of their footsteps and the sound of nature fills their ears.

"Where are you heading, exactly?" asks Luc.

"Unless you've transported us to another planet this must lead somewhere."

"Oh yeah it does lead somewhere, in about five miles you're going to hit a road, quite a small road."

"Well fine, I'll just keep walking then."

"You won't very far Eddi. Your withdrawal's going to start kicking in you must be feeling it already."

"Whatever."

"Right, well you go on, I'll head back to Holby but I'll have to report you. Then again, no one will be surprised; in fact it will explain a hell of a lot. I'm sure they'll be supportive, give you a second chance but it'll be a very public humiliation."

_Get off my case Luc!_

"Argh."

"Suspension, counselling, rehab. Er drugs tests every single week once you are back at work are you up for that? Or, you could er, you could give up nursing I suppose."

_Do what?_ _He hates me that much?_ "You'd really do that to me?"

"In a heartbeat."

_This man can be so vile_.

"But listen, you say you're not addicted so, just stay here, prove that to me, that's all I ask."

_What is it going to take to get him off my back?_

"Fine. But when this is over, don't ever speak to me again, okay?"

"If that's how you feel."

Silently they both make their way back to the van, each lost in thought.

_How am I ever going to get out of this? I wish I never knew him. All he's done is mess my life up even more than what it was. I wish he would simply leave me alone. Why does he need to fix things, why does he need to fix me? Am I right? Is he doing this out of guilt? Well, he's not going to get away with it that easily!_

_I wish she would let me help her. This is all my fault to begin with but that's not my soul reason. I care for her, want to see her safe, but I can't do that if she won't let me. I should never have left, it was a bad mistake on my part. Why did I have to follow my head instead of my heart?_

As they come through a break in the trees the campervan comes into sight and Eddi picks her pace up a bit, Luc's footsteps a constant reminder of his unpleasant company.

Reaching the side of the van she flops against it, cold and exhausted, however when Luc goes to wrap a blanket around her shoulders she jerks away.

"No don't, don't touch me Luc, okay."

He is pained by her continuous rejection but he expected nothing less.

_That's it Eddi, nice deep breaths, you can do this, stop the pain. Just nice, deep breaths _and she rests her head back, closing her eyes.

"I'm sorry," Luc continues. "For what I did, for, for leaving you. I'm, I'm sorry." _This is so difficult._ "I-I-I could try to e-explain why, but I think you probably…"

_Just stop Luc, please shut up!_

"You know I did push you away Eddi. You had this really annoying habit of getting under my skin. You still do."

"You really hurt me Luc."

"I know I did," _oh how I know_. "I know." _How can I tell her?_ "But, I-I care about you and I'm trying to put things right."

"It's too late." _Far too late and nothing you will say can change that_. "I don't want you in my life anymore, okay. You think these pills are bad. You are ten times more toxic."

_Oh no I'm going to be sick again_ and she makes a move behind the vehicle and spews up her guts.

"Not again," he mutters to himself and slowly makes his way to see how she is faring.

_Just stop stomach, please stop!_ Crunching of leaves, rustling of clothes. _Great, Luc's coming._

"You know what's happening don't you? And you know it's just going to get worse. The anxiety, the panic attacks, the aches, the pains. Your stomach's going to keep contracting. Pretty soon you'll probably become incontinent…"

"Oh shut up Luc."

"…and if you've been binging it's going to get worse quicker. Just take one, okay. That's the way to deal with it, a supervise dose. All you need to do is tell me exactly how many you've been taking."

"Argh, you would like that wouldn't you, mmm?" _I just want this pain to stop!_ "Me breaking down…and you having to save me, right? But I'm sorry to disappoint you Luc, but I, argh, I don't need it." _You're shivering and the intense stomach cramps are saying otherwise_.

_This woman is too stubborn and it's killing her! What am I to do?_ He gets up and walks away but before turning the corner he whispers, "I wish you could see what I'm trying to do."

While Eddi continues to heave her insides up Luc goes back to the book he was previously reading, attempting to keep his mind on other things for the time being. This plan is somewhat hindered by the continuous noise from the overdosed woman. It grates on his nerves and he finally abandons his book to go to her.

"Leave me alone Luc."

"I told you I-I don't need it."

"Are you doing this to punish me?" _I can't stand seeing her like this._

"I don't need you, you know," and the touch of his hand on her forehead sends a little tingle through her body. "I don't need anyone, I don't want anyone."

"Eddi, please, please don't do this. I know you hate me but it's just not worth it, if this is a serious as I think, if you've been taking as many as I think you have then this could kill you."

"What would that really matter?"

"Stop it," _I can't believe what she is saying!_

"It's not like anybody really cares."

_That's it she really needs to see sense. _

"I care," he whispers. "Eddi, look at me, look at me. Look at me. I care." _Please see this Eddi, please believe me._ "Okay?" Her gazing at him is enough for now. The feel of her skin under his touch is like heaven. He's missed this more than he knew. He kisses her forehead, _I've been longing to do that for a while_. "Come on, give me your arm, come on. Come on, come one," and with her arms around his neck he struggles them to a stand and once steady, lifts her up in his arms, cradles her like a baby and carries her over to the chair the other side under cover.

Gently placing her down he then disappears for a moment into the van and then returns to her with a blanket.

"Eddi."

Once placing it around her shoulders he kneels down by her and sets about rearranging it around her body, making sure she stays warm.

"You-you know everyone leaves Luc, everyone always leaves."

"Shush, come on it's okay."

"No, it's, it's really not okay. I think, I think I had this coming though."

"What?" _now what is she going on about?_

"I left Liam," as she looks at him there is fear in her eyes. "When he needed me I left him."

"Come on, it wasn't that simple."

"Hmm, he never really went to school. 'Cos she, she, she just, she wasn't up. She was either too drunk or she just wasn't there. The first day I ever could I just ran away, and left him. And now, everyone leaves me, don't you. You left me, Max left me. I really thought Max cared about me."

_Oh God Eddi, please stop torturing yourself._

"I won't leave you. Eddi. Eddi. Never again. Do you want me to help you?" _Come on Eddi, please, let me help you_.

She grunts her agreement. "Just one."

Luc kisses her once again on the forehead before standing.

"Just one."

"Just, just take the edge of a little bit."

"Just take the edge of, is that all it is?"

_I can't believe he is doing this to me!_ "Oh no Luc, please. Just give them to me…"

"You can have one when you admit of a problem Eddi. When you admit…"

"Just one, please give them to, please give them to me, Luc!" and she leaps forward in desperation but only ends up falling in the bud in a pathetic heap.

"Oh, Eddi." _She has really sunk as far as I feared._ Crouching down he helps her into and into a sitting position between his legs. "Come here, shhhh, it'll be fine, come here," and he cradles her to him her in a ball clinging on to his shirt, trying to keep the tears at bay.

The cold, damp bud seeps through his trousers but he doesn't care. He doesn't care about anything but the vulnerable creature curled up in his arms.

"Come on trust me. Let go." _Let me in Eddi_.

"I can't. I can't Luc." _I can't do either. I did that once and it destroyed me._

"Come on, what's the worst that can happen?"

"I'm so scared."

"Course you are, course you are. Can't be any worse than this though can it. Can't be any worse than this," and the emotion finally gets to him with the last. Seeing her like this is killing him inside and he feels completely helpless.

Finally it gets all too much for her and the tears burst their barriers. "That's it, that's it. I've got you. I've got you." Luc hugs her closer to his chest, comforting her, trying to absorb her pain. "Let go. Do you want me to help you?"

Eddi nods her head and a squeak of 'yes' escapes.

"Yeah?"

_Yeah, please help me Luc_.

"I need to hear you say it."

_I can't._

"I need to hear you say it."

_I can't but I know I need it._

"I need you to help me. I need you to help me."

_That's it, that's my Eddi, I'm here._

Eddi takes and swallows the pill Luc's given her then clings to him as if her life depended on it….actually it does. If it weren't for him she could be lying in a gutter or worse, dead! His heart breaks that little bit further especially as he knows he's the cause of her downfall. From this moment on, he'll try and protect her with all that he has.

_I'm here for you, always will be._

Gradually her breathing eases as she calms down. She relaxes in his arms bit by bit.

"I-I'm sorry Luc."

"It's okay, it's okay. I'm here now."

"I'm afraid."

"So am I. More than you'll ever know."

After a quiet moment or two of gentle breathing, she shifts to get up.

"I need some air," and once standing she smiles down briefly to Luc then strolls over to the middle of the field and lets the wind embrace her and clear away the stress.

There is nothing like the sound of birds tweeting and fluttering from tree to tree, nature singing its tune that's endless. It soothes her, relaxes her and she takes this time to think on him.

_Luc in some shape or form has been there for me when I needed him the most, but will he always be there? Will I always be around? I wish I had faith in us but it's hard to when neither one of us is stable. Can I really achieve what he wishes me to? How did is come to this?_

Closing her eyes she takes in a deep breath and breaths out again. Behind she can hear Luc making his way towards her. When he reaches her side a secret smile lights up her features and she can't help but reach out and hold her hand. She's missed the contact, no matter how many times she wishes to deny that fact.

"You can have another two in four hours. Obviously it takes longer to come off them than the time you were on them, but it's okay. We'll do it. We'll do it."

_I wish I had the same faith in me as you do Luc._

_I'll never leave you again Eddi. I can't. Not now I've fallen in love. _


	2. Day One - Part One

Day One – Part One

After the events of the prior day and the fact that he has been relegated to the sofa, it's no surprise Luc didn't get a good night's sleep and was up at the crack of dawn. What was the point in attempting to get some sleep when the mind wouldn't rest? All through the night he dreamt of _her_, but this time she wasn't alone. Eddi was in this dream too. The two women he gave his heart to. However, the prominent difference being, one he lost years ago and the other he is in the process of losing, but both came about at the hands of his failure as a man, as a person and as a surgeon.

There is only three ways he knows how to deal with his stress: throw himself into his work, i.e. mainly his lab research, but seeing as that is hidden away back at Holby it is not an option; runaway and start afresh in a new place with strangers who don't know him and who he doesn't care to get to know, but with the precious cargo lying asleep in his van it's not a viable option either, unless he wants to be accused of kidnap again! Then there's exercise, which in recent years hasn't been his main priority, though running back and forth on the hospital wards has kept him in pretty good shape.

And as Eddi stirs from the van, that is what she comes upon as she steps out into the open air wrapped up in one of Luc's warm baggy cardigans. There, with beads of sweat gliding down the sides of his face and glistening across his shoulders and back, soaking into his grey t-shirt, which is currently clinging to his skin and outlining his firm muscles, is Luc pumping away doing press-ups. As she stands their admiring his physique it is a firm reminder to what she has lost.

Her thoughts are overpowered by the pain shooting across her abdomen as her stomach contracts and the urge to vomit reaches excruciating heights.

A slight groan escapes which in turn disrupts Luc's concentration and he immediately stands to greet her, wiping the sweat from his brow as he goes.

"Eddi?"

"It's okay, it will pass."

"I think you better sit down before you fall down," and he guides her over to a camp chair.

The slight contact of skin touching skin causes a tingle to run through their bodies and for a fraction of a second both their minds recapture the very first time they kissed, the touch of his fingers as they stroked her arm. Another contraction of Eddi's stomach breaks the spell and they carry on.

Once settled Luc offers her breakfast.

"I'm not hungry."

"Eddi, you must eat."

"I won't be able to keep anything down, so what's the point?"

"This is not the attitude, Eddi. You need to…"

_Give it a rest will you Luc!_ "I didn't know you exercised," she says in an attempt to change the subject.

_Oh Eddi,_ he sighs to himself knowing right now is not the time to push things. He's only just got her back on his side; he doesn't want to lose the trust already.

"It's a means to clear my head more than anything. If I can't have my research, exercise is the next best thing. Now, how about a bit of scrambled egg," and before she has chance to reply he turns his back and sets to task leaving Eddi to her thoughts.

_Why is he helping me? Because he loves you_ her conscience whispers, but she denies it. She'd rather believe it's out of guilt._ He knows it's due to his leaving I turned to this state; he's helping to preserve himself. He's doing it for himself not me,_ but even as this pops into her head she knows it's a lie. Deep down she understands he's as troubled as she, he just wouldn't share. _Maybe that's why he's so obsessed in fixing things. Something must have happened in his past where he had no control over, or was blamed for losing control, so now everything has to be fixed, the question is what?_

Her thoughts are interrupted as Luc serves breakfast. She whispers a weak 'thank you' and they eat in silence. Eddi avoids all eye contact and remains looking steadfast at her food while Luc can't help but watch as she takes each mouthful, watching her struggling to consume each bit.

_How can I help you Eddi?_

…..

In the end Eddi only managed to eat half of the scrambled egg that he gave her, which he polished off, no point in wasting quality food. After washing up he left her reading one of his books to go and take a shower.

As the warm droplets cascade down his back soothing his aching muscles his mind begins to wander to the past and to the woman currently in his care. Each one different yet the same in their own way, both situations was his fault.

He was unable to save his fiancé because he was drunk. He was forcefully evicted from the room and deemed unfit for work. He knew then he had to leave. Leave the force, leave his old life behind and run. And that's what he has been doing ever since. When things got too much he runs, but now look where that has gotten him! He's done it again, endangered the woman he cares deeply for. Admittedly it was her choice to get involved with Max, to get drawn in to his ways and take the drugs, but he's the one that drove her to it. He gave her hope then let her down. What does that make him? In ways it makes him no better than Max, except Luc had a conscience and eventually he owns up to the truth one way or another, at least to himself if nothing else.

But now he is able to do something, be there for her. For once in his life he's decided to face what he's afraid of. He can't lose another woman he loves. It's time to move on from the past and start living, to fight for what he believes is right.

The water runs cold and he turns it off and steps out. Rubbing the excess water away he wraps the towel firmly around his hips and steps out of the cramped bathroom and straight into Eddi, who was making her way into the caravan.

"Umph!" she grunts and stumbles backwards.

Luc reaches out quickly and grabs her around the waist and pulls her towards him, her hands come to rest on his bare chest.

_Oh my! I don't remember him to be this muscular! Or as tan! It's amazing what three months can do._

And with a mind of their own, her fingers begin to delicately caress the contours of his chest, marvelling in the feel of the muscle beneath his skin. The muscle tightens as he tenses at her touch. Then she hears his sharp intake of breath when one of her thumbs brushes over a nipple.

"Eddi," his husky voice whispers into the electrical charged air between them.

Her hands automatically glide down to his stomach as she gazes up to see him looking at her with passion burning in his pupils. It's a look she's longed but alternatively feared to see again.

Luc licks his lips and swallows as the tension builds. Her eyes capture each torturing moment and all too soon it becomes too much for her and she is forced to turn away and take a few steps back. The chill settles instantly between their bodies like fog across hills.

All those memories, all the pain comes flooding back and they our powerless to stop it. They've always had that chemistry, that spark, but things have changed, _they've_ changed. However, eventually it will creep up on them and hit breaking point. It's a matter on _when_ not _if_. But now is not the time to act on it. The question is how long will they be able to rein in their thirst for one another?

"Eddi?"

"No, no, no Luc, not now, please, I'm begging you."

With her back to him she hears shuffling movement. Knowing he's drawing closer she stiffens before turning around.

"I said don't!"

"Eddi…"

"No. I can't. I won't." He takes another step closer and a drop of water escapes from his hair and slides down his torso to soak into the towel bound around his waist. Eddi doesn't fail to notice, nor can she ignore the effect it has on her. "I said no."

As their eyes continue to hold they are able to see the hurt and hunger reflect in each other's. The wrongs vs the rights, a battle of wills, but who will give in first?

"I want your help Luc, but…" she nibbles her lip. "But I don't want this," she gestures her hand between them. Looking away she shakes her head. "I can't do this."

The next moment she is brushing past Luc and out of the caravan and he is left staring at a closed door.

"What am I supposed to do now?"


	3. Day One - Part Two

Day One – Part Two

Once Luc cooled his ardour and was freshly dressed he went in search of Eddi, determined to get things back on track. He couldn't let his feelings get in the way of her recovery. Now was not the time to act on his selfish impulses, no matter how much he wished otherwise.

Every time he thought of her his heart would skip a beat. Those months away were torture, but even as the pain grew he couldn't find it in himself to come back. Not until the call from Sacha. That call changed everything and there was no way he could deny the ache any longer. He had to return, just to see her face one last time, but the shock of seeing her groping another guy and in _his_ lab of all places, was enough to make him flee again.

Something stopped him.

All boxed up and ready to go, it must have been fate when Sacha halted him in his exit. Though if he was truthful to himself, deep down he knew jealousy played an important part in his decision to remain. Yes, Sacha was the cuddly big brother bear he never had and he could persuade a caveman to stay and embrace in a warm hug, but the moment he saw Max flirting with Eddi and her return laughter, the green eyed monster reared its ugly head and he knew then and there that he must at least try. After all, they were always a good team if nothing else. They bounced off each other.

So taking one last, deep breath, he pushes open the caravan's door and steps out into the fresh air. _I'll never tire of the outdoors. It's freedom_.

After opening his eyes he spots her immediately sitting under a tree in the distance, her knees wrapped tightly against her chest.

At first he thought she had been crying due to her closed posture, but as he draws closer her face looks relaxed, not distressed and a small smile lights up her features. With her eyes closed she embraces the wind as it whips her face and brings a rosy hue to her cheeks creating an almost earthy glow about her appearance.

Luc stops in his tracks a few feet away. He has never seen anything more beautiful. _How could I have left this woman? I must have been mad!_

"Eddi," he softly whispers unsure if his presence is appreciated.

"It's okay," she replies, eyes remaining closed. "Please. Sit," she absentmindedly pats the spot beside her.

Tentatively he closes the remaining gap and lowers himself to the ground beside her, back resting against the tree.

While fiddling with his fingers contemplating what to say next, Eddi takes it out of his hands by speaking first.

"I can't remember the last time I got to enjoy the fresh air, nature. I mean truly appreciate it. To just stop and take in the beauty around me." All of a sudden her eyes snap open and she turns to face Luc, brown orbs clash. "I envy you sometimes. Don't get me wrong, there are many crap things about you that out way the good, but out of it all there is one that I envy and that's your disregard about your responsibilities and the freedom to escape, go anywhere at any time." She gazes back across the fields. "Of course there are repercussions to your actions and you come back like nothing has happened," her eyes flicker to his, "and that, by the way, is one of your many crap qualities," before looking away again. "I know you don't run because you simply can without any ties, you run to try to escape what plagues you, but it doesn't work. It never works." Once again her eyes latch onto his, this time the understanding shining right through. "Does it Luc? It's always there lurking in the corner, haunting you wherever you go and it'll never stop until you face it, head on if necessarily." After a brief pause she asks, "Why do you run Luc?"

He frowns at her question, fingers entwine and he starts to rub his thumbs together. Eventually he turns his head away to focus on the ground between his legs. A weighty question is now bearing down on his shoulders. _How am I to reply?_

"The same reason you drink. The same reason you took them pills. To try and forget, move on. To feel a sense of euphoria for a while and to embrace it, but it never lasts. The past always catches up one way or another."

_Why am I telling her this? I've never told anyone anything since that day. Then again, I've never felt so close to another person as I do Eddi, not since… Well, if I can't tell her, who can I? I want that trust…_

After taking several deep breaths he begins. "Her name was Elise Lorreay, she was a member of the armed forces, while I was in the army medical corps, but more importantly she…she was my fiancée. Our relationship was kept a secret as they frown on things like that in the army. Messes with your judgement and all that bollocks, they said." His eyes begin to tear up as he warms to the story, recollecting things from the past he'd rather forget. "S-she wasn't supposed to be with them, she should have been back at camp, safe, where I could see her, but they were a man down. She had to go." Luc's frown deepens and the grip on his hands gets tighter as images from long ago flash throughout his mind. "I remember hearing the call over the radio, but in my inebriated state I didn't pay attention."

His eyes lift to stare unwavering at Eddi, all the pain, the guilt shining brightly there's no mistaking his burden. Tears break the barrier and flow freely down his cheek.

"I was drunk Eddi! When she needed me the most I couldn't help her. Shot in the stomach, blood everywhere," he looks away across the fields. "So much blood. Too much. Y-you see, the thing is, s-she h-had this rare blood normality…"

_His obsession with blood now becomes clear_ runs through Eddi's head as she finally understands.

"…it wouldn't clot properly, just like that boy who had Glanzmann's thrombasthenia, but I didn't know that, n-not till she was brought to me that day, unconscious and barely breathing. I so badly wanted to help, everything inside me was screaming to save her, but I couldn't operate, they wouldn't let me anywhere near her. She bled to death on the table as I watched helplessly from the side-lines. I couldn't function properly after that, not as a medic nor as a man. I was eventually discharged from the army where I immediately received some counselling. It didn't help, not really.

"Ever since, that day has been eating away at my insides bit by bit to eventually it becoming a part of who I am and I learnt to live with it. That's where I went wrong, I know that now. It became such a familiar feeling I forgot how to be me. The _real_ me. The man I was before Elise's death. I've been so alone living with the guilt of my lack of control. How could I have been so stupid…?"

A gentle touch to his arm breaks the spell and he looks up to see affection and sorrow shining in her eyes. Not sympathy or pity, never those and he is pleased. He never wants to see that look again.

"You're not alone anymore Luc. I'm here for you as you're here for me. Together we'll find a way through this storm and you weren't stupid, only human. You were at the right place; it was just the wrong time. Even if you were completely sober, you still may have never been able to save her…"

"But I could have had the opportunity to try at least, can't you see! I could have saved her!"

"Luc, if there is one thing I have learnt from all that's happened to me, from my Comoxidan overdose, is that you can't let the past get to you. You'll only end up destroying yourself in the end. I want to…no. I _need_ to stop living in the past and I think you need to do the same. Together we'll be able to do this. Together."

With a brief encouraging smile she rests her head against his shoulder and let the moment wash over her. The feel of his warm body next to hers, the touch of his fingers as he begins to caress her head, it is home. With Luc by her side she knows she'll be able to get through anything.

It won't be an easy ride, it never was when it came to these two, but they wouldn't want it any other way. They have each other and that is all that matters at this stage. The rest they'll be able to figure out as they go.

….

"Is it that time already?" asks Eddi as she huffs onto the sofa, Luc sitting beside with one Comoxidan tablet in one hand and a glass of water in the other.

"Yes, the last one of the day. You're doing well so far."

"I don't call throwing up the contents of your stomach as 'doing well'."

"That's to be expected, along with the mini mental breakdowns."

"You calling me mental now!" she glares at him.

"Now you're just taking everything I say out of context. What happened to us helping each other?"

"Well these pills certainly aren't helping me," she folds her arms.

"And whose fault is that?!"

"Okay, I'm sorry," she snaps before taking a steadying breath and carrying on in a calmer voice, "I'm sorry."

"I never said it was going to be easy. This is only day one and you're already improving." She scoffs. "Okay, maybe not a great deal, but these things take time, you can't expect to go back to normal overnight. Now take these and then I think you should get some sleep, it's been an emotional day all round."

With that he pushes the items in his hands towards her.

After a hesitant pause she muffles something inaudible and downs the pill.

"Now, that wasn't so hard was it?" he says as the beginnings of a smirk crawls onto his face accompanied by a slight mischievous glint in his eye.

"Oh stop looking so smug Luc, doesn't suit you," but the little lift of her lips says otherwise. _He actually looks rather adorable…stop it Eddi, now is not the time, you said so yourself. You just want his help, nothing more…liar_.

"Right, now off to bed with you," and he stands to move out of the way.

"Yes _dad_. But this time I'll sleep on the sofa…"

"Eddi…"

"No arguing. I'm shorter than you, plus I'm quite happy to spend the night on the sofa."

"Eddi…"

She places a finger on his lips without thinking, "I said no."

Then just as swiftly the atmosphere changes and the sexual tension is back, causing each heart to beat a bit faster. Eddi gazes between Luc's eyes then to her finger of his delectable lips and back again. She yanks her hand away and takes a step back, avoiding all eye contact by focusing on her feet.

"Erm, yes, well," Luc stutters under the uncomfortable feeling the moment causes. "You can have the sofa tonight then, but you're back in the bed tomorrow night."

"Good," she mutters without looking up.

"Good." Silence. "Right, I better…"

"Yes, and I need to…"

"Yep."

Without another word they go their separate ways, Luc to outside to cool his rapidly heating body, Eddi to the bathroom to change.

Left to their solitude they both are thinking the same thing.

_How am I ever going to get through this week without giving into the temptation?_

…..

A couple of hours later and Eddi is sound asleep wrapped up on the sofa, the events of the day finally taking its toll on her weak body. However, Luc does not have the luxury to rest his mind. Once again, it is unsettled, but this time it isn't due to the past but the future and more importantly, the woman lying peacefully by his side.

As he soothingly strokes her forehead he can't help but wonder where he is to go from here, what happens when they go back to reality, back to Holby. Will things go back to the way they were, flirtatiously arguing with one another, but never really becoming an item? Or will they return as a couple, ready to face whatever life throws at them, together?

_Whatever happens will happen and I'll deal with it then. But I will try by best not to lose her; she's too precious for that. Let us get through this week first without killing each other and then we'll take it from there_.

With one last lingering look and a gentle kiss to the tip of her nose, he reluctantly rises from her side, switches off the light and makes his way over to bed, finally giving into the ache of his body and with one thing lingering on his mind; he slowly drifts off to sleep.

_One day down, five to go._


End file.
